Lenity
~
My shadow is growing longer
I haven’t heard anyone laughing
We must be the last ones left
I don’t have to look to know you’re there
Whoever you are, your mother is calling you
I thought her voice was calling me
But then she called you sweetie
My mother never says that anymore
The other kids have been laughing, playing
I haven’t spoken a single word
No laughter, no smiles, no friends
Just like my mother, I’m alone
Her heart and smile went with him when he left
Why did he have to leave us?
Why did he have to take her and leave me?
My mother doesn’t remember that I’m here
I don’t even know if she remembers that she’s supposed to love me
I wish I could cry
But I don’t know if it’s right
Do you ever have to cry?
You, with the mother who loves you?
I wonder, is your voice the one I kept hearing
I wonder if you’re the one who laughed the loudest
You must be happy to go with her
It must feel nice to go back to an unbroken home
She calls you again, I don’t quite catch your name
I wasn’t listening
Just like no one listens to me
I kick the wood chips, I want to kick something else
I want to scream, and cry, and I want to be loved again
I wish my mother would hold me tight
Looking at my shadow, I see something
Another shadow, moving into mine
I didn’t hear you, you were so quiet
So different from your laughter
So very much like me
Your mother is calling, shouldn’t you go?
I look up to see why you’re here
You look at me, and I don’t know what you’re thinking
But I know you can tell that I’m sad
You wrap your arms around me and hold me tight
Squeezing gently, only for a moment
Then you let go
And you smile at me, your smile is happy
Suddenly you turn around and run
Running to your mother, to go home
You only look back once, still smiling
I think you were trying to make me happy
You don’t even know me, how could you know?
How could you tell that I was sad?
Somehow you knew, and you wanted to help
You were only here for a moment
Yet it still feels like you’re standing in front of me
I still feel like you’re hugging me, holding me
I start to smile, I don’t want to cry anymore
You knew, and I hope you still know
I hope you know that you were right, you succeeded
You made me happy!
~
Second in the pair of poems I wrote while experimenting with free verse poetry.